


For every picture, our love shatters.

by NintendoSatoRi



Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Compliant, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, Heavy Angst, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, M/M, Oikawa Tooru-centric, Out of Character, Photographs, Sad Oikawa Tooru, it's a little confusing, only partially
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27369502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NintendoSatoRi/pseuds/NintendoSatoRi
Summary: The Polaroid pictures that encapsulated their childhood together, that held all of their emotions and memories felt empty.Like all of the happy memories were sucked out of it every time they detached themselves from the wall and fluttered to the ground slowly.And he had come to wonder when he had become so attached to the feeling he got whenever he looked at the pictures, especially since they're now gone.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995355
Comments: 8
Kudos: 12
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	For every picture, our love shatters.

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome back to Day 3 of Haikyuu Angst Week 2020!  
> Now.. ehehe-  
> Maybe you can tell from the title or maybe you can tell from me literally adding the first fic to it but this is kind of a continuation for my Day 7 fic of Iwaoi fluff week, called "For every picture, my love grows."
> 
> You don't really need to read that one in order to understand this one though unless you wanna know when the pictures were taken etc.  
> Though I do suggest you read the other fic first :))  
> ^ mostly because I actually kinda like the way that fic turned out oho-
> 
> This is a shorter fic, considering it is more of a sequel-ish for the fic above and I didn't feel like ruining my fluff fic too much with the angst follow-up.
> 
> I wanna say sorry about this fic because I don't really like the main reason as to why one of them snapped. It was a childish-like idea and kinda stupid. I ended up not specifying what exactly it is but it still feels slightly out of place.  
> So yeah, if anything is wonky then that's the reason!
> 
> Okay, potential trigger warnings for this fic include:  
> \- lashing out, which leads to the following below...  
> \- minor violence  
> \- violent tendencies  
> \- feeling numb
> 
> Other than that, I hope you enjoy this fic!
> 
> Iwaoi:  
> Day 3, Tier 1 + 3: Photographs + "I can't lose you/this too."

_For every picture, their love grew. Stronger, faster, and unbreakable._

_..._

_Or so they had thought._

\--

His hands trembled, he could feel the tears rolling down his cheeks as though they weighed tons as he listened to his husband scream and yell.

But none of it was actually processing in his mind.

**_"Tooru you!-"_ **

**_"I can't fucking believe-"_ **

**_"How dare you!"_ **

**_"How could you do this-"_ **

He was confused.

Done what?  
_Done what?_

"Hajime-" 

"No! Shut up for one second goddammit!"

And Tooru could only cower as he watched his husband continue to roam their house with heavy footsteps, before rushing back to push him into a corner.  
He didn't do anything.

Right?

"H-Hajime-"

Tooru flinched as the other hit the wall beside them, watched as some of the polaroid pictures he had so neatly stuck on the wall fell, floating to the floor slowly.

It all felt weird.

They had been fine just yesterday.  
Or at least that's what Tooru thought.

They had been fine, they loved each other, their relationship had been like the tranquility of the night sky, filled to the brim with stars and quiet beauty. They should still _be_ fine, so what was happening? Why was Tooru so confused?

His husband was mad at him, the argument was one-sided but he couldn't stop it, only watching in despair as the Polaroid pictures he had so carefully hung up began to rain down on his fallen figure like memories.  
Happy?  
He couldn't be sure anymore.

Hajime was still screaming nonsense at him, things he didn't understand, and for some reason, that hurt him all the more.  
If he could just know what he did wrong, then maybe he could fix this. Maybe then they could go back to taking silly pictures in the kitchen and cuddle as Tooru explained the night sky to his husband for the thousandth time.

Maybe they could go back to laying in bed together, Hajime's arm wrapped around his waist as they stared at the wall of Polaroid pictures and reminisced on their childhood.

But instead, everything was breaking down, each picture falling off one by one and Tooru could only watch as Hajime packed a bag.

He watched as the bag slammed against the wall when his husband threw the bag over his shoulder, watched as the last Polaroid picture began its descent to the ground. It fell to the floor, floating slowly. It felt as though all the happy memories shattered the moment it did, as though someone had torn every single photo apart with their bare hands.

"Hajime please.." Tooru said, hands shaking as he got up from the ground and stumbled after the other, only to slip on a picture and fall back down.

His head hurt.  
His surroundings were beginning to crumble as he watched Hajime walk out of their bedroom door.

"Hajime, please! I can't lose you!" He shouted, letting out a sob when he heard no verbal response. The door to their house slamming was an answer enough.  
It all moved so quickly, but he felt as if his world had stopped.

It practically had, after all.

Tooru stayed on the ground, his shoulders shaking and elbows hurting from the fall.  
"Hajime... please, come back." He cried out, the tears streaming as silence filled the void.  
His eyes looked around, widening at the sight of all the pictures on the ground. They looked at all the little captions he himself had written on them, tears falling harder and soaking into the tatami floor.

_The best second years!_

_First kiss with Iwa-chan! Maybe more..? <3_

_Iwa-chan and I joined the vb team!_

_First date (with Iwa-chan!!!) Amazing!_

_First 'I love you's! So surprising!_

_New friend! Iwaizumi Hajime, aka Iwa-chan!_

Tooru's eyes began looking around frantically, grasping a Polaroid picture with its edges folded and the color of it tinted yellow. He stared at it, feeling his bottom lip tremble as tears fell to the floor once more.  
"Hajime..." He whispered as one last attempt. The last sliver of hope that his husband was actually still here in the house with him, that whatever he did wasn't as drastic as Hajime thought. The last sliver of hope that was dwindling as time ticked by.

"I can't lose you..." He choked up, shoulders trembling as he cried.

"Not like I lost these too." Tooru breathed, his sobs filling the room that now felt cold.  
Like all the warmth and cheerfulness the house held had disappeared.

He stared back down at the picture in his hands.  
It was devoid of the happy memory that was once attached to it, to all of the Polaroid pictures.

And Tooru let out another heartwrenching sob, chest aching.

His fingers trembled as they lightly ran down his husband's young face, trying to feel the genuine glee and surprise that that image used to hold, only to come back empty-handed.

Each emotion left once Hajime did, Tooru noticed.  
All except for the drowning pain he felt in his chest.

\--

Even the pain that had secured itself inside of his chest had begun to fade, Oikawa realized.

Because now, as he stared at the Polaroid pictures, all his heart did was feel empty and his entire body felt numb.

Oikawa stared and stared, the hope of feeling anything when looking at them now long gone as he traced the edges of the pictures. It was just another image, something that now meant nothing to him.  
Or at least that's what he told himself. Because he knew that they still had something in them, he still held some attachment to them.

Because if he truly didn't then he would have thrown them away already.

Maybe it was the numbness that held him back. Oikawa didn't want to get rid of them on a bad note. After all, these were all of his childhood memories with...  
him.

Iwaizumi.

Oikawa felt his throat clog up.  
Ah, so there still were emotions for the other. The one who he now no longer contacts, the one who no longer speaks to him for reasons still left unclear in Oikawa's mind, the one who he still considers his best friend while Iwaizumi doesn't.

Maybe he still had hope that Iwaizumi would talk to him one day, that he'd show up at Oikawa's doorstep and tell him that he wanted him again. That he still loved the younger and that Oikawa could be embraced by his arms once again.

That this time, Oikawa could be the one to declare their love again by getting down on one knee, watch as Iwaizumi gets embarrassed and mutter the response quickly. That he could truly appreciate the look and feel of a wedding band around his finger. A feeling he truly missed now that the ring was gone.

Oikawa stared at the pictures, thought about the man that no longer belonged to him, and felt his heart cracking slightly. Was the pain finally settling back in? Because at this point, the brunette would welcome anything to get out of the never.ending loop of emptiness, sitting on the floor of the bedroom he once shared with another human being and staring at pictures that left him numb all over.  
He'd accept anything that wouldn't leave him as an empty husk by the end of the day.

He missed his charisma, missed the way he could so easily make jokes and flirtatious remarks for fun. He missed the way it felt genuine at the time. Because now, walking out of the front door, Oikawa realized how good of an actor he is.

He lets out a laugh that resembled him; dry and hollow.

Maybe he should've become an actor, then he would be able to act and get paid.

\--

Oikawa could remember his heart racing, and how he had hope that maybe he could stare at the pictures with love in his eyes again.  
He had thought that maybe it could all go back to normal, maybe he and Iwaizumi could remain together.  
Or friends, he didn't mind.

Oikawa had missed Iwaizumi so much.

So when the other suddenly talked to him, it felt like all the stars in his world had returned, all his colors turned vibrant.

But maybe he never was supposed to have him in the first place, Oikawa thought as they talked, noticing the new ring wrapped around Iwaizumi's ring finger.  
A new love.

And he realized that he lost him.  
Just like all the happy emotions the Polaroid pictures (now hidden from every eye) once held.


End file.
